The Excellent Files

OK I promise this is the last X-Files post for a while and it's brief. Mulder's been dispatched to the desert to find a downed alien spacecraft. This is the trailer.

"Hey Scully! Can you hear me? Can you hear me now?"



"What's that? No, I'm not wearing eye shadow Scully. I just haven't slept in three days. I'm in the desert. Yeah, the desert. I've had reports of a downed alien spacecraft. I brought my pointy alien killing thingy just incase! What's that again? No, it's the weirdest thing. I have 30 points of articulation and I still can't get this damn cell phone all the way to my ear. I'm not yelling!"



"Sh*t Scully, I think I found it. It's...it's amazing. No sign of life though. What should I do? I know! I'll recite a really long paragraph full of impressive jargon and intellectual phrases in a serious monotone, then I'll approach it cautiously! I got my piece out. OH...and my gun!"



"Scully! I know I hung up five minutes ago, but I need to talk to someone. Hey, there's weird alien hieroglyphics on the side. It....It says....I.K.E.A."

"HOLY SHIT!!! What the f*ck!? Where'd the sun go? The craft is glowing!"

"Goddamn it Scully. The sun's back and there's an alien in front of me. He's already dead. I never even got to use my pointy alien killing thing! I never get to have any fun."




To never be continued....

What? Do you think I have all day for this crap?